12 Things to Look for in a Great Wellness Coach

by Maria Koropecky, Wellness Coach

Are you interested in healing a health concern in your life? Would you like to work with a Wellness Coach? If yes, you may also be wondering, “How on earth am I going to find a qualified wellness coach” and “where do I start?”

When "I" is replaced with "we" even illness becomes wellness.

First, to find a qualified Wellness Coach, do an online search using the keywords “wellness coach” and “your city.” You might also like to add the words, “best” and “near me.”

Also, ask your friends and co-workers for a referral — maybe they know of someone who does a good job.

With today’s technology, you don’t necessarily have to live in the same city or area as your Wellness Coach, but scheduling appointments is much easier when you live in the same time zone.

Another good idea is to keep an eye out for upcoming live wellness-related workshops, talks, and events in your area. Hearing a Wellness Coach speak is a great way to preview their professional style and area of focus and it’s a wonderful chance to meet likeminded people, too!

Come up with a list of at least three names, (my brother told my mother to find three bids on her home renovations and I think that’s good advice when you’re thinking about hiring any professional services).

let's connect on Skype.

Once you have your list, take the time to review their websites and then call them to see if you can set up a consultation appointment to meet them — either through online video, by phone, or in person — to see what they’re all about.

Consultation Appointment

As you’re meeting with a prospective Wellness Coach, look to see if they have the following qualities:

  1. Interpersonal skills: Do they make you feel comfortable? Do they establish a good connection with you? Do you like them enough to spend time with them?
  2. Communication skills: Are they explaining their work in a way that makes sense? Are they actively listening to what you have to say?
  3. Professional: Are they presenting themselves in a professional manner? Do they take pride in their appearance?
  4. Caring Personality: Do they have a friendly, calm, patient, and caring nature?
  5. Practice Self-Care: Are they walking their talk, practicing what they preach, and taking good care of themselves?
  6. Empathetic and Compassionate: Can you tell if they have an understanding of what it’s like to be in your shoes?
  7. Knowledgeable: Are they knowledgeable in their field of practice?
  8. Self Confidence: Do they know their own value and the value of their coaching services? Are they assertive enough? Are they good at solving problems and making decisions?
  9. Physical Stamina: Do they have the energy and stamina needed to keep up with the demands of their profession?
  10. Flexibility: Are they willing to be flexible to accommodate your needs?
  11. Trustworthy: Do they come across as honest, trustworthy, respectful, and reliable?
  12. Like their work: Do they enjoy what they do for a living and do they genuinely smile often?

Hopefully, you’ll have a check mark next to all of the above. Feel free to add you’re your own preferences to this list as well. You’ll also want to keep your eye out for any of the following red flags:

Red Flags

  1. Distracted by drama: Are they focusing on you, the client, or are they busy with something else?
  2. Closed Communication: Is it hard to reach them by phone or email? Are they dismissive or rude?
  3. Burnout: Are they showing signs of fatigue, depression, stress, and burn out?
  4. Frazzled: Are they unkempt? Are they organized? Are they running late?
  5. Arrogance & Snobbiness: Is their nose in the air? Is their ego in the way?
  6. Judginess: Do they make you feel bad about yourself by judging your appearance, age, state of health, lifestyle choices, marital status, etc?
  7. Exorbitant Fees or Bargain Pricing: Are their coaching fees in line with other life coaches and wellness coaches or are they way too low or way too high for the market?
  8. Gut Instinct: Do you have a bad feeling when you’re talking to them?

If the consultation goes well, go ahead and book your coaching sessions. But if any of these red flags show up, then go with the person you feel will help you the most.

Taking the time to arrange a consultation appointment and meeting a prospective wellness coach on the phone or in person is a great way to see if you click before you make any long-term commitments.

Working with a talented Wellness Coach is definitely worth the investment and I hope you find a great Wellness Coach who ticks all of the boxes!

Wellness Coach Maria Koropecky.

And, if you’d like to meet me, Maria, for a complimentary consultation appointment to see if you’d like to work with me as a Wellness Coach, I’m currently offering Free Crystal Mapping Sessions. If you’re interested, please call or email me. I’d be happy to meet you online or in person (if you live in Victoria, BC) at your convenience.

Request a free crystal mapping session with Maria today!

Love this Song! Thanks, Natasha!

Unwritten, Natasha Bedingfield

I am unwritten, can’t read my mind, I’m undefined
I’m just beginning, the pen’s in my hand, ending unplanned
Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
Oh, oh, oh

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We’ve been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can’t live that way
Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten
Oh, yeah, yeah

Songwriters: Danielle A. Brisebois / Natasha Anne Bedingfield / Wayne Steven Jr Rodrigues
Unwritten lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Unwritten
“The rest is still unwritten…”

I’ve adopted Unwritten as my own personal theme song for this year. It’s so upbeat and fun and inspiring and the video makes me smile.

I’m going to sing this song to myself whenever I like! Maybe even dance a little, too!

I’ve always liked this song, first released in 2004, even though it made me a little uncomfortable — I didn’t quite get it — but now some of the lines really jump out at me.

“Open up the dirty window” — it’s like, let some fresh air into your past and let it breathe.

“So close you can almost taste it” — I feel like I’m on the verge of a breakthrough and it’s within reach.

“Release your inhibitions” — that’s about accepting yourself as you are and just going for it.

“No one else can feel it for you” — you can’t look outside of yourself for validation or live vicariously through other people.

“Live your life with arms wide open” — that’s about surrender.

“Today is where your book begins” — You can only create from here, the present moment.

“The rest is still unwritten” — Endless possibilities.

Wow. That’s a really powerful song!

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be able to live your life as your most authentic and vulnerable self — no shame, no inhibitions, no fear, and be able to connect with other living beings on a genuinely deep level — no egos, no games, no agendas — just being and letting things unfold naturally?

How refreshing is that?

Crystal Mapping Sessions

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Email Maria to book your free Crystal Mapping Session today!

Request a free crystal mapping session with Maria today!

The Top 1970’s TV Shows that Influenced my Life

On Friday nights, back in the 1970’s, when I was a kid growing up in Nova Scotia, I used to love opening up the hide-a-bed, popping a bowl of popcorn, choosing a bottle of pop from the Poppe Shoppe, and watching the TV show, Donny & Marie.

top 1970's tv shows that influenced my life.

Maybe you can relate to the days when TV’s were:

  • square,
  • when they were either black & white or colour,
  • when they had rabbit ears that never quite sat in the right place for best reception,
  • when you had to turn a chunky dial to change channels,
  • when remote controls were a luxury and some even attached to the TV with a chord,
  • when there were only three major networks,
  • when there was only one TV in the house, and
  • your parents said, “Don’t sit too close to the TV or you’ll hurt your eyes.”

If you can remember those days, you’re probably a Gen-Xer (born between 1961 and 1981) like me.

When I think back on all of the TV shows I used to watch when I was a kid, I’m struck by how inspiring many of them were.

I have a CD of TV show theme songs which I listen to every now and then when I need a little pick me up. How can you not feel better when you hear, “Who can turn the world on with her smile…” or “Well, we’re movin’ on up…”?

Yes, listening to music is part of practicing self-care and I like to call it, “Music and Sound Therapy.”

The theme song lyrics are really empowering, especially for women, who were breaking new ground in those days and the messages are just as powerful today!

I believe these TV shows from the 1970’s shaped my values and my dreams and expanded my ideas of what was possible for me to do in my life!

My Favourite 1970’s TV Shows

  1. Donny & Marie
  2. the Carol Burnett Show
  3. the Mary Tyler Moore Show
  4. the Brady Bunch
  5. Wonder Woman
  6. the Bionic Woman
  7. Charlie’s Angels
  8. Happy Days
  9. Laverne & Shirley
  10. The Love Boat
  11. Bewitched
  12. Little House on the Prairie

I know these TV shows might be a little cheesy and campy in today’s world, but that’s part of their charm. I, personally, appreciate their wholesome inclinations.

As you may have noticed, these TV shows, in their own way, are all about striving to have a better life, regardless of your humble beginnings.

All it takes is a little love, creativity, imagination, resourcefulness, smarts, physical fitness, a sense of adventure, a sense of humour, and close friends and family!

How about you? What are some of your favourite TV shows from your childhood? Please leave a comment and share your memories.

If you also watched and enjoyed many of the TV shows I mentioned (though of course there are many more) when you were in elementary school, please contact me.

Perhaps I can help you navigate this next chapter of your life as you approach perimenopause and menopause. Yes, Gen-Xers are currently in our 40’s and 50’s and that’s worth celebrating!

Let’s continue to carry the torch of empowerment and keep running the good race!

Wellness Coach Maria Koropecky.

Crystal Mapping Sessions

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Email Maria to book your free Crystal Mapping Session today!

How to Save an Extra $1378 this Year

by Maria Koropecky, Wellness Coach

Since we’re heading into a new year, I thought it would be nice to share a system to save an extra $1378 in 52 weeks.

Who couldn’t use an extra $1378 in their pocket one year from now?

piggy bank.
Matthew Henry, photographer

52-Week Money Challenge

It’s called the 52-Week Money Challenge.

You may have come across this 52-Week Money Challenge system before and you may have thought it was a good idea, but for some reason you didn’t follow through. Well, it’s a new year and a new you so let’s give it another try together!

And if you have managed to save money with this challenge in previous years, please let us know in the comments and share your tips on how to be a successful saver!

In my coaching conversations, I talk about practicing self-care often and saving money is part of a healthy Financial Self-Care plan. I highly recommend getting into the habit of paying yourself first and tucking away some money for your future!

Anyway, I’m planning to follow this 52-week Money Savings Challenge myself each week for the next 12 months and I’m inviting you to join me. It’ll be fun!

Instructions

There are 3 different ways that you can participate in this 52-Week Money Savings Challenge so don’t feel like you have to follow it to the original letter (Option #1) to be successful.

Option #1 — Original Method

  • Week: 1, Deposit: $1, Account Balance: $1
  • Week: 2, Deposit: $2, Account Balance: $3
  • Week: 3, Deposit: $3, Account Balance: $6
  • Week: 4, Deposit: $4, Account Balance: $10
  • Week: 5, Deposit: $5, Account Balance: $15
  • Week: 6, Deposit: $6, Account Balance: $21
  • Week: 7, Deposit: $7, Account Balance: $28
  • Week: 8, Deposit: $8, Account Balance: $36
  • Week: 9, Deposit: $9, Account Balance: $45
  • Week: 10, Deposit: $10, Account Balance: $55
  • Week: 11, Deposit: $11, Account Balance: $66
  • Week: 12, Deposit: $12, Account Balance: $78
  • Week: 13, Deposit: $13, Account Balance: $91
  • Week: 14, Deposit: $14, Account Balance: $105
  • Week: 15, Deposit: $15, Account Balance: $120
  • Week: 16, Deposit: $16, Account Balance: $136
  • Week: 17, Deposit: $17, Account Balance: $153
  • Week: 18, Deposit: $18, Account Balance: $171
  • Week: 19, Deposit: $19, Account Balance: $190
  • Week: 20, Deposit: $20, Account Balance: $210
  • Week: 21, Deposit: $21, Account Balance: $231
  • Week: 22, Deposit: $22, Account Balance: $253
  • Week: 23, Deposit: $23, Account Balance: $276
  • Week: 24, Deposit: $24, Account Balance: $300
  • Week: 25, Deposit: $25, Account Balance: $325
  • Week: 26, Deposit: $26, Account Balance: $351
  • Week: 27, Deposit: $27, Account Balance: $378
  • Week: 28, Deposit: $28, Account Balance: $406
  • Week: 29, Deposit: $29, Account Balance: $435
  • Week: 30, Deposit: $30, Account Balance: $465
  • Week: 31, Deposit: $31, Account Balance: $496
  • Week: 32, Deposit: $32, Account Balance: $528
  • Week: 33, Deposit: $33, Account Balance: $561
  • Week: 34, Deposit: $34, Account Balance: $595
  • Week: 35, Deposit: $35, Account Balance: $630
  • Week: 36, Deposit: $36, Account Balance: $666
  • Week: 37, Deposit: $37, Account Balance: $703
  • Week: 38, Deposit: $38, Account Balance: $741
  • Week: 39, Deposit: $39, Account Balance: $780
  • Week: 40, Deposit: $40, Account Balance: $820
  • Week: 41, Deposit: $41, Account Balance: $861
  • Week: 42, Deposit: $42, Account Balance: $903
  • Week: 43, Deposit: $43, Account Balance: $946
  • Week: 44, Deposit: $44, Account Balance: $990
  • Week: 45, Deposit: $45, Account Balance: $1035
  • Week: 46, Deposit: $46, Account Balance: $1081
  • Week: 47, Deposit: $47, Account Balance: $1128
  • Week: 48, Deposit: $48, Account Balance: $1176
  • Week: 49, Deposit: $49, Account Balance: $1225
  • Week: 50, Deposit: $50, Account Balance: $1275
  • Week: 51, Deposit: $51, Account Balance: $1326
  • Week: 52, Deposit: $52, Account Balance: $1378

Option #2 — Random Method

Option #2 uses the same chart as above, but instead of following the incremental order as outlined, you can pick any amount from the list and deposit that amount during any given week. You may want to get some of the bigger ones out of the way early so they don’t all pile up at the end and stop your progress. Just remember to check them off as you go!

Option #3 — Equal Installments Method

Option #3 is perhaps the easiest option of the them all. Some people stop doing the 52-Week Savings Challenge part-way through because they forget which week they’re on and how much they’re supposed to deposit at that time.

The answer is depositing the same amount into your savings account each week, every week. No pressure, no guesswork. In this case, if you still want to go for having an extra $1378 at the end of the year, just deposit $26.50 each week (or $1378/52 weeks) like clockwork for 52 straight weeks!

Whatever option you choose, have some fun with this. Remember you’re a creative and resourceful human being — you can find this extra cash if you keep your eyes open!

But if you happen to miss some weeks, that’s OK. Just pick up where you left off and keep going. Even a fraction of the $1378 is better than nothing!

Photo by Shopify Partners

Tips to Save Money

First of all, in order to start saving money on a regular basis, it’s important to have a safe place to keep your cash. You can open up a designated Savings account at your bank. You can also save your cash in a special jar at home.

Just make sure you know your opening balance in your Savings account or piggy bank before you start adding cash so you know your starting point and then watch your savings grow from there!

Some experts suggest moving 10% of your paycheques into your savings account each time you get paid before you spend it anywhere else. You can set this up automatically with your bank.

You can also slide a certain dollar amount or percentage over to your savings account every time you use your debit card.

Also, if you get paid in tips, (which is free money in a way) try salting those coins and dollar bills away instead of spending them.

Another savings trick is to pay cash for everything. It’s old school but it may help you be more conscious of where you’re spending your money and how much you have on hand. Also, anytime you have some change leftover from your cash purchases, set it aside as well!

With cash, you also save your money because you’re not paying interest charges on top of the original purchase price for years on end on your credit cards. Why pay unnecessary bank charges?

Another savings tip comes after you buy something on sale. You know how your receipt often says, “You saved X-amount of dollars on your purchase?” Well, if you want, you can quickly move that same X-amount of dollars into your Savings account right after your shopping trip and actually save the money before you spend it on something you don’t really need. And then you’ve actually saved the money the store said you did!

If you’re starting with me today, you have until end of day on Saturday, January 5, 2019 to make your first deposit. Of course, you can start this anytime of year.

During this first week, think about what you’d like to do with your cash in 365 days. Knowing the why behind your effort and commitment to saving your money will help you stay focussed on your goals.

So, what is your intention for saving this money?

  • Are you saving money to go on a trip?
  • Are you paying for your own upcoming wedding?
  • Are you planning to put the cash towards a downpayment on a house or car?
  • Are you thinking of investing in yourself by going back to school or signing up for a coaching program?
  • Do you want to give this money as a gift to someone else?

Whatever you do, don’t say you’re saving money “for a rainy day” because that’s too vague and you’ll just end up creating a bunch of rainy days.

Save for something you’re excited about having one day. In our culture, we’re all about getting instant gratification but I invite you to train yourself to think beyond instant gratification and strive for the long-term. That’s what savings is all about!

Also, please resist the temptation to withdraw from your Savings Account before the end of the year! Keep it to DEPOSIT ONLY!

Add some Sparkle to this Savings Challenge

Also, as a bonus option, if you want to add some sparkle to your 52-week money savings challenge, you can:

  • Create a Pinterest Board or Vision Board
  • Say affirmations like, “My Savings account is growing and growing each day.”
  • Wear crystal jewellery such as Amazonite, Amber, Bloodstone, Citrine, Garnet, Green Aventurine, Jade, Morganite, Peridot, and Tiger’s Eye to remind yourself of your goals.
  • Use cloves as an essential oil and in cooking because it helps with prosperity.

Please let me know if you’d like to participate in this challenge and we can help each other stay on track. I’m looking forward to celebrating with you at the end of the year next year!

Good luck! Maria

Free Crystal Mapping Sessions Available

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Email Maria to book your free Crystal Mapping Session today!

Wellness Coach Maria Koropecky.

What do I talk about in my next wellness coaching session with Maria?

by Maria Koropecky, Spiritual Wellness Coach.

Whether you’ve been working with a wellness coach for several months or if you’re about to have your first ever coaching session, sometimes it’s challenging to find a topic to talk about.

When "I" is replaced with "we" even illness becomes wellness.

Working with a wellness coach can certainly be a life changing investment! In order to get the most value during your time with your wellness coach, it’s important to show up prepared and ready to go, and part of that includes having a topic to talk about.

If you’re having trouble answering the question, “What do you want to talk about today?” take a moment to ask yourself some questions before your coaching call to get your mind in gear. Here are some suggestions:

  1. Is there a recent positive experience you’d like to share — maybe something to celebrate?
  2. Is there a recent negative experience that you’d like to reframe?
  3. Did you take the action steps that you talked about during your previous coaching session?
  4. Have any questions come up for you during the past week that you’d like to ask?
  5. Have you had any insights and aha moments?

Hopefully, these five questions will be enough to inspire an animated and productive coaching conversation with your wellness coach, but if not, and you’re still asking yourself, “What am I going to talk about in my next wellness coaching session?” I’ve come up with a list of topics for you to choose from.

Here are some wellness coaching topic ideas:

Rest & Relaxation

“I’d like to sleep better.”

“I’m having trouble coping with stress and I’d like to find better ways to manage stress and relax.”

“I’d like to explore some ways to manage my anxiety.”

“I’d like to add meditation to my morning routine.”

“I’d like to figure out ways to better manage my pain and/or chronic illness.”

“I’d like to go on a vacation soon and I’d like to plan something really special.”

Healthier Lifestyle Choices

“I’d like to make significant changes in my life starting with my health.”

“I’d like to take a break from my digital devices.”

“I’d like to quit smoking cigarettes.”

“I’d like to quit drinking alcohol.”

“I’d like to clear some clutter in my house.”

“I’m feeling stuck in life and I don’t know what to do next.”

Relationships

“I’d like to heal my broken heart.”

“I’d like to have a better relationship with my partner and family.”

“I’ve just moved to Victoria (or another new city) and I’d like to meet some new people and make some new friends.

Aging Gracefully

“I have a big event coming up (like a milestone birthday, class reunion, wedding, etc.,) and I’d like to look and feel my best.”

“I’d like to balance my hormones and manage my PMS, Peri-menopausal or Menopausal symptoms.”

“I’d like to have clear skin on my face and body.”

“I’d like to have a healthy baby.”

“I’ve seen other people suffer in their senior years and I don’t want to be in the same boat. It’s up to me to take charge of my health now so that I can enjoy my life to the fullest and age gracefully.”

Fitness & Nutrition

“I need to make better choices in regards to what I eat.”

“I’d like to add exercise to my daily or weekly schedule.”

“I’d like to lose weight at a healthy pace.”

“I’m planning to run in a 5K charity event or marathon.”

“I’m recovering from a car accident or sports injury and would like to feel better.”

Career

“I’d like to get along better with my co-workers.

“I travel a lot for work and I’d like to maintain a healthy lifestyle even while I’m on the road.”

“I’m giving a presentation at work and would like it to go smoothly.”

“I’m thinking about changing careers or going back to school.”

“I’m thinking about becoming a wellness coach myself.”

“I’d like to start a workplace wellness program at the office.”

Do any of these ideas jump out at you? With coaching, whatever you talk about is up to you, the client.

As a wellness coach and spa therapist, I help my clients relax and have piece of mind and all of these topic ideas relate to managing stress in some way.

If any of these wellness coaching topics resonate with you, I encourage you to explore them in your upcoming coaching conversations and see where they take you. They just might hold some missing pieces to the puzzle you’re working on.

Crystal Mapping Sessions Available

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Spiritual Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Email Maria to book your free Crystal Mapping Session today.

Wellness Coach Maria Koropecky.

Making Peace with the Fear of Being Judged

by Maria Koropecky, Spiritual Wellness Coach

Many people like to sit on their high horses and look down their noses at everyone else and judge, judge, judge. It’s like a favourite pass-time or maybe even a sport!

man makes judging face.

Judging each other is nothing new. It’s part of our human nature. I think it’s like a survival skill. We need to know who is a friend and who is a foe and even 3-month old babies can read someone’s energy.

Quickly judging someone, rightly or wrongly, tells us if we can like and trust them, if we can feel safe with them, or if they’ll harm us or maybe even kill us. And with that assessment, we slap a big label on them and put them in a shoe box for future reference and treat them accordingly.

Often, the person being judged can suffer some consequences. Ultimately, I think that we fear being judged because it can literally mean a death sentence. Some people believe in a Judgement Day so that can tie into a fear of death. Also, if someone judges you, they can take away your livelihood and freedom.

When I was in high school, I read a book called, The Scarlet Letter by Nathanial Hawthorne — talk about judging! Set in Puritan Massachusetts in the 1640’s, poor Hester Prynne had to walk around with a big red A on her chest after she had an affair with a married man and became pregnant with her daughter, Pearl.

Can you imagine having to sew a red A for adultery on all of your clothes and say, “Hide your husbands everyone, Big A is coming down the street!” Thank goodness we’re not so strict anymore. Still, the judginess continues 400 years later…

As a highly sensitive person myself, I feel like I’ve been judged and criticized harshly all of my life. When I was growing up in the 1970’s, it seemed like the adults in my life (like my grandparents and teachers) only spoke to me when they needed to correct me about something — this time with big red X’s — and those criticisms were never sandwiched between compliments as they might be today.

Consequently, I interpreted their “well-meaning” words as “I’m not enough,” or “I’m not good enough,” or “they don’t like me,” or “there must be something wrong with me.” Not easy beliefs to live with to say the least.

By the way, did you know there’s a word for that?
Atelophobia is about the fear of imperfection and the fear of never being good enough, and by extension, the fear of being judged.

Who knew? Anyway, I also thought, well, “that’s how you treat people,” so I also became very critical of everyone I knew in my life, too. Needless to say, my opinions stated as facts didn’t go over well and I lost a lot of friends over the years. Not so much fun to be around. I’ve since worked on becoming less judgemental and not letting my ego run the show and I feel like I’m making good progress in that area.

But my fear of being judged still comes up every now and then.

In the last few weeks, I’ve been reminded of my beliefs about worthiness again. There’s an acquaintance in my life right now who is criticizing my every move and is bluntly and without care or sensitivity or warmth, pointing out all of my mistakes, making herself right and me wrong. She’s treating me like the adults did in my childhood! If only she could say something nice first, then I’d receive her “suggestions” better. Instead, I become defensive and I end up saying things that come out wrong and we clash and it’s not pleasant.

So I know what it’s like to be judged and criticized and it hurts. It’s hard not to fall into that trap of believing someone else’s opinion of you over your own.

I’m trying to remind myself, “Don’t let someone’s low opinion of you, lower your own opinion of you” and “Your value doesn’t decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth,” and

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent,” Eleanor Roosevelt.

I can’t blame this acquaintance for how she’s making me feel. It doesn’t have anything to do with her. She’s just holding up a mirror. It’s all me which means I can change what I do next.

The good news is, the recent events in my life have inspired me to write this blog post and this situation is giving me the opportunity to challenge my outdated beliefs and clear them away once and for all!

woman kicking.

Spiritual Ideas to Make Peace with the Fear of Being Judged

  1. Practice Self-Care — If someone is giving you a hard time and is trying to push your buttons, do something nice for yourself (like get a massage or get your haircut or go for a long walk outside) and show yourself you care.
  2. Acceptance — The sooner you accept yourself as you are, accept others as they are, and accept the situation as it is, the sooner you’ll feel better.
  3. Forgiveness — Forgive everyone everything, especially yourself and anyone you feel is judging you. Let go of your past grievances because otherwise they may negatively affect your work (which would in turn create more judgment).
  4. Perfect is Boring — If you think being perfect will keep the judgers at bay, you’re not entirely off the hook. Some people are threatened by perfect people and other people will keep digging till they find some dirt. And striving for perfection is exhausting and if you do happen to be perfect, there’s nothing else left to do or learn anymore — no more room to grow — so what’s the point?
  5. Let Yourself Be Seen Anyway — Some people try to avoid being judged by hiding under the covers and staying home all day because it’s just too risky and dangerous to put themselves out there. But not going out into the world doesn’t work either because it’s a waste of our gifts and we’re here to share and help each other and shine our light.
  6. Lighten Up On Judging Others — Somehow, by not being so judgemental of others, others will not be so judgemental of you. When you find yourself making a mean comment about someone, ask yourself, “What’s that about?” We tend to judge people on what we think is important (like fashion or good driving) and if you catch yourself judging someone and ask yourself about it, you’ll gain some valuable self-awareness in the process.
  7. Relax Your Grip — Part of judging is trying to control other people. Don’t be so rigid about how people should behave or how things should be done. Everybody brings something different to the table and your way is not the only way. Give people a break and let them be who they are.
  8. Send Compassion Instead — The next time you see someone who doesn’t seem to be measuring up to your standards, send them compassion. They’re doing their best.
  9. Remember Your Sense of Humour — So what if you have spinach in between your teeth or if you’ve worn your shirt inside out in public — on the same day! 🙂 Turn your misadventures into funny stories that everyone can relate to and don’t take yourself so seriously.
  10. It’s All Just Feedback — I find if I look at comments as feedback and not criticism, it takes the edge off them. Also, if someone is judging you and telling you something you don’t want to hear, it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re being mean. Next time that happens, remember it’s just feedback. You have the choice to accept their notes or not. But maybe, if you apply their observations to your life, it just might help you up your game and be a better version of yourself.
  11. It’s Not The Truth of Who You Are — Someone’s snap judgement about you is not the Truth (it’s an opinion at best) so don’t consume it like food and put it in your body and carry it around with you and give it meaning, especially if it feels bad.
  12. Labels Are Meaningless — We are not superficial labels of things. We are not our hair colour, we are not the cars we drive, we are not our jobs or our marital status, or the mistakes we make, or our accomplishments. The essence of who we are is so much more than packaging and appearances. We are human beings with tremendous potential!

Here’s a quote from Bob Marley about Perfection in a Relationship:

you're not perfect, he isn't either.

I hope this blog post helps but if you’re still struggling with the fear of being judged and you’re bouncing between perfectionism and avoiding being seen like I have, this is a topic we can work on in our wellness coaching conversations. Please contact me, Maria, if you’d like to talk about your options. I promise I’ll create a safe space for our meeting.

Wellness Coach Maria Koropecky.

Crystal Mapping Sessions Available

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Email Maria and book your free Crystal Mapping Session today.

If I Owned a Ferrari…

by Maria Koropecky, Spiritual Wellness Coach

Of course I noticed the burnt orange Ferrari in the grocery store parking lot in the midst of all of the pick-up trucks and SUV’s and shopping carts on that sunny, Friday afternoon!

When I see something extraordinary in my day to day life, like a $250,000 sports car, I like to wonder about the people involved and what their lives might be like.

man driving in sports car interior.

This time though, not only did I see the car, but I also got a chance to see the driver/owner before he went into the store. He was an older gentleman and he caught my attention because after he parked his car, he got out and spent a good few minutes just admiring his car from all angles, like he was really pleased with his purchase and the aesthetics of the vehicle.

This observation got me thinking.

If I owned a Ferrari, I’d do my best to take really good care of it!

  • I’d wash the outside of the car weekly;
  • I’d keep the inside clean (no trash and junk cluttering up the space);
  • I’d keep the inside smelling nice like a new car (no junk food leftovers or cigarette butts or old gym bags);
  • I’d put high performance fuel into the tank and would keep it filled well above empty;
  • I’d bring my car to my mechanic for regular maintenance;
  • I wouldn’t drive recklessly (no drunk driving, no distracted driving, no texting while driving, no road rage, no show-off speeding, no stupid stunts);
  • I wouldn’t go into sketchy neighbourhoods;
  • I wouldn’t let strangers drive it; and
  • I also wouldn’t keep my car up on blocks under a tarp hidden in a garage somewhere and only take it out on special occasions, if ever.

And then it occurred to me. Although I don’t own a Ferrari, I have something far more precious and valuable! Something you can’t put a price tag on and it’s not about a status symbol or how much money I make an hour or what my life insurance policy says I’m worth.

I have a unique, special, and a one-of-a-kind, never to be repeated in the history of the Universe, BODY, MIND, and SPIRIT! — I HAVE MY LIFE!

Being alive, right now, is really extraordinary in the grande scheme of things!

I decided in that moment that I was going to be more mindful about how I treat myself and to honour my own existence. I can’t take my life for granted and that’s why I’m so passionate about self-care.

Just like the Ferrari, it’s important for me to cherish myself and do nice things like:

  • being well-groomed and doing an occasional spa treatment;
  • keeping my space clean, organized, and tidy;
  • fuelling my body with nutritious food (and avoiding toxic or poisonous substances);
  • going to see my doctor for regular check-ups;
  • not venturing into potentially dangerous situations;
  • not letting other people speak or think for me because I’m in the driver’s seat of my own life;
  • and not keeping myself as the best kept secret and never going out and enjoying new experiences!

Most of us aren’t going to be high-performance, Olympic athletes like a Ferrari but it’s still really important to practice self-care as if we are the most precious beings in the Universe, because we are — we all are!

Spiritual Guidance Available

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Spiritual Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Subscribe to this Crystal Clear Coaching blog and book your free Crystal Mapping Session today.

Gratitude is the Secret Sauce of Life!

by Maria Koropecky, Spiritual Wellness Coach

I’m going to start off by saying Thank You and Happy Thanksgiving!

I hope you’re enjoying this time with your family and friends and you’re tasting all of your favourite treats like turkey and mashed potatoes and gravy and pumpkin pie and all of the fixins’ that come with this special holiday.

I’m sharing this day with family-friends and I’m counting my blessings. I have so much to be grateful for in my life! It’s always nice when people invite me over and serve delicious food made with love.

Two men are shaking hands in front of a photocopier to say thank you.

Most of us (especially polite Canadians! 🙂 ) are taught to say “thank you” after we receive something and that’s great. It’s an acknowledgement of an energy exchange.

Usually, the order is:

  1. Someone gives something to you or does something nice for you; and
  2. You receive it; and
  3. You say, “Thanks!”

But today I want to turn that order on it’s head and suggest saying “thank you” first!

Whaaattt???

When we say thank you and are grateful for what we have, it means our needs are being met and therefore, there’s no need to fill anymore. Everything is taken care of and it’s a wonderful position to be in.

Sometimes, though, the things we most need and want seem to be missing. So, the question is: How do we create what we want to have and bring the good things in?

The answer is gratitude! Gratitude is the secret sauce when it comes to having what we want in life!

I’ve been studying the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza and he says, “Gratitude is the ultimate state of receivorship.”

The idea is, be grateful first, as if you already have what you’re asking for, and then you’ll receive it.

I know at first glance that what I’m talking about seems to put the cart in front of the horse and it may even sound like a downright lie. But I promise, once you get the balance right, it’s quite elegant!

Gratitude Spectrum

There’s a sweet spot on the gratitude spectrum that will make asking for what you want and receiving all kinds of gifts and blessings way easier.

On the one end of the spectrum, when you’re asking someone for something (like your parents, spouse, boss, or the Universe) you may be crossing your fingers and hoping and praying and saying, “please, please, please!”

Unfortunately, pleading is not a sustainable or optimal method of manifestation. Sure it works sometimes because people may feel sorry for you, but pulling at people’s strings comes across as really desperate and needy and weak and will more than likely turn people off. It’s also quite manipulative.

As Dr. Joe said in one of his interviews, “hope is a beggar.”

And then on the other end of the spectrum, declaring what you want in no uncertain terms is also a misguided approach. It’s a “Give this to me or else!” expectation. It brings to mind robbing someone at gunpoint and making a demand and scaring the daylights out of people in the process.

Using force comes from a place of fear and hostility and never ends well. And ultimately, being overly demanding never includes gratitude.

Gratitude is the sweet spot

As it turns out, gratitude is the sweet spot between begging and demanding! Gratitude is the secret sauce when it comes to allowing and receiving the good things in life!

Do you know why? Because gratitude is a giving energy! It’s generous and it creates a space for things to happen.

Gratitude is giving thanks that we already have what we’re asking for. Gratitude is coming from a place of faith and trust that what we want and need are already in our magnetic field and are on their way to us and it’s just a matter of time before they show up in physical form.

I know that when I finally receive something I’ve needed, I feel a sense of relief on top of the gratitude. When I feel relief and gratitude, I can relax and know that things are going to work out and I’m OK. Isn’t that way better than worrying and doubting and feeling fear?

Try this next time:

  1. Say thank you and be grateful for what you want to have, do, be, or give;
  2. In your imagination, see yourself having what you want and feel what it would be like to have what you want; and
  3. Receive and have and enjoy what you want!

So the next time you’d like to create something in your life, say over and over again, “I’m so happy and grateful and relieved now that I have….” (especially before you start seeing any evidence that what you’re doing is working) and really feel deep in your heart what it would be like to have what it is you’re asking for and really honestly, sincerely, and authentically, feel grateful in the present moment for everyone and everything that you can think of, including what you want to create.

It’s an amazing feeling!

As you can see, there’s no need to beg, borrow, or steal in our abundant Universe. There’s more than enough for everybody and it all starts with gratitude!

Thank you!

Spiritual Guidance Available

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Spiritual Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Subscribe to this Crystal Clear Coaching blog and book your free Crystal Mapping Session today.

7 Inspiring Celebrity Self-Care Quotes

by Guest Blogger, Paul Joseph from Health and Fitness Travel
and Maria Koropecky, Wellness Coach

Now a trillion-dollar industry, wellness has become a buzzword and a lifestyle of choice for many. Each day, as countless people are becoming more proactive about their health and wellness, new companies are sprouting up to serve them. With all of the choices out there, sometimes it’s hard to know what to do next to keep things fresh.

That’s why I’ve teamed up with Health and Fitness Travel to write this piece. As avid promotors of healthy living, Health and Fitness Travel, the wellness holiday specialists, explore the famous faces responsible for inspiring us to shift our attitudes towards wellness, self-care, and healthy living. From actors, to musicians, to athletes, here are 7 celebrity self-care quotes to inspire and encourage you on your healing journey.

lounging in Cali.

1) Self-Care Tips From A Friend: Jennifer Aniston

With her sparkling blue eyes and phenomenal figure, you can just tell Jennifer Aniston takes good care of herself. As a long-term yogi and an open advocate for organic nutrition, Jen promotes a wholesome diet, getting your beauty sleep, and applying nourishing skin care products daily to encourage a healthy mind, body, and soul.

“Sunday is my spa day. I usually do a little mini facial time where I just give myself a good scrub, use a mask, and then the new Aveeno hydrating facial. I leave it on overnight and when I wake up, I have that dewy, glowing, twinkling skin,” ~ Jennifer Aniston

spa treatment.

2) Music For Mental Health: Zayn Malik

A long-time sufferer of anxiety, Zayn Malik, the ex-One Direction singer, has shined a light on the topic of mental health, especially for men. After pulling out of the 2016 Capital Summertime Ball because of his struggles, this defining move opened up the conversation and lead him to the recent #ITSOKAYTOTALK campaign that has raised an alarm to the growing male mental health crisis. With the single biggest killer of men under 45 being suicide, many celebrities including Ricky Gervais, Matthew Lewis, and Harley Bonner are taking part in the campaign to give men the confidence to talk about their mental wellness. Regardless of whether you’re a man or woman, or older or younger than 45, if you’re going through a mental health crisis, please reach out to someone and get help right now. #ITSOKAYTOTALK

“This is for girls who have the tendency to stay up at night listening to music that reminds them of their current situation. Who hide their fears, hurt, pain and tears under the smiles, laughs and giggles on a daily basis. The girls who wear their heart on their sleeve. The girls who pray that things will work out just once and they’ll be satisfied. The girls who scream and cry to their pillows because everyone else fails to listen. The girls who have so many secrets but wont tell a soul. The girls who have mistakes and regrets as a daily moral. The girls that never win. The girls that stay up all night thinking about that one boy and hoping that he’ll notice her one day. The girls who take life as it comes, to the girls who are hoping that it’ll get better somewhere down the road. For the girls who love with all their heart although it always gets broken. To girls who think it’s over. To real girls, to all girls: You’re beautiful,” ~ Zayn Malik

3) Age Is Just A Number: Cameron Diaz

One of Charlie’s Angels is now a vocal advocate for the natural process of aging, stating that beauty is not just about your face… it’s about how you take care of your whole body. Her principles, accompanied by a healthy dose of science, are printed in ‘The Body Book” and “The Longevity Book.” Together, these are revolutionary wellness bibles on how to look and feel well. Her wholesome, holistic, and all-loving approach to aging is truly refreshing, especially these days where women are constantly pressured to keep themselves looking young.

“It is the responsibility of every human, not just dancers, sports stars, kids, and Olympians—to move. To embrace movement. To become movement. To live movement. Because moving can turn a regular Monday into an extraordinary start to your week. It can turn Tuesday into a quest, Wednesday into an adventure, Thursday into a triumph, Friday into a feat. No matter how you spend your days, claiming your right to MOVE is like claiming your FREEDOM,” ~ Cameron Díaz

Beach fitness.

4) Feeling Fabulous: Kate Hudson

Kate Hudson is incredibly passionate about inspiring others to lead happy and healthy lifestyles. In 2013, she started her own line of athletic wear called, ‘Fabletics’ and it has truly taken off! With her stunning and inspiring Instagram posts of her cardio and Pilates routines, it’s no surprise that Kate has inspired both men and women to ramp-up their fitness while having fun and looking fabulous, too. She’s also been known to emphasize the importance of good skin care, stating that she loves a facial massage and toner to keep her skin looking fresh and rejuvenated.

“The irony is that when we take care of ourselves first, we are in a much stronger place to take care of those we love,” ~ Kate Hudson

5) Meditation For Peace Of Mind: Russell Brand

With Russell Brands’ loud personality and flamboyant wardrobe, it’s hard to imagine him in a moment of serious quietness. After years of struggling with addictions, he realized that to recover, he needed to dig deeper within and confront the side of himself that he’d been trying so hard to cover up. With the help of meditation, the well-known comedian, actor, and activist was able to find peace. A true inspiration within this wellness revolution, he’s also the author of “Recovery: Freedom from Our Addictions” and is now helping others by sharing his story and promoting the David Lynch Foundation, which provides transcendental meditation classes to people in at-risk communities.

“You need only allow gentle hope to enter your heart. Exhale and allow hope, and give yourself some time. This is a process of change that requires a good deal of self-compassion, which is neither stagnant nor permissive. We can just start by being a little kinder to ourselves and open to the possibility that life doesn’t have to be bloody awful.” ~ Russell Brand

man in pool.

6) Serving Up The Sun Protection: Maria Sharapova

Playing tennis all day and living in the “Sunshine State” certainly have their perks, but like Maria Sharapova will tell you, you have to remember to take care of your skin health while you’re out there, too. Following sound advice from her mother, the international tennis champion grew up with a great awareness about the effects of the sun on our skin. Inspired by shocking skin cancer statistics, Maria co-founded the sun-cream brand Supergoop to encourage others that no matter how old or young you are, or where you live on our planet, the time to start wearing sun cream is now!

“I still love things that you don’t even need to pay for. Going to the beach and being around five of your friends and having a good time means so much more than going out and spending hundreds of dollars,” ~ Maria Sharapova

7) Queen Of The Green: Beyoncé

After confirmation that Beyoncé would be headlining the much-anticipated Coachella Festival this year, the ‘Single Ladies’ star went vegan. She followed a 22-Day Nutrition meal planner, a program which she co-founded with her husband, Jay Z, and celebrity trainer Marco Borges. The aim of the program was to challenge both themselves and the public to move towards a plant-based lifestyle to benefit not only personal health, but also the health of our planet. She’s a Green Leader through and through! With environmental awareness growing and the love for animals spreading, veganism has been hailed as the single biggest way to reduce our environmental impact on Earth.

“We have to care about our bodies and what we put in them. Women have to take the time to focus on our mental health — take time for self, for the spiritual, without feeling guilty or selfish. The world will see you the way you see you, and treat you the way you treat yourself,” ~ Beyoncé

So, that’s it for now. If you’d like to refresh your wellness and self-care practices with some new ideas, we hope these 7 celebrities have inspired you! Whether you’d like to fuel your body with more nutritious food, or change up your skin care routine, or become a Green Leader in your community, or lengthen your meditations, or spice up your wardrobe, or try a new sport, the important thing is to just go for it starting today!

Looking to go on a Wellness Holiday?

With offices in London, Melbourne, Manila, and Toronto, Paul Joseph is the co-founder of Health & Fitness Travel, the Wellness Holiday Specialists. For advice, guidance, and booking, visit: www.healthandfitnesstravel.com or call 0203 397 8891.

Spiritual Guidance Available

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Spiritual Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Subscribe to this Crystal Clear Coaching blog and book your free Crystal Mapping Session today.

Give No-Phone Zones A Chance!

by Maria Koropecky, Spiritual Wellness Coach

In 1993, I had a chance to go spring skiing in the Austrian Alps. I remember climbing onboard a tour bus along with several seasoned skiers of all ages on a mild, Saturday morning in April. We left from Munich, Germany and headed toward the “Sound of Music” neighbourhood of Salzburg, Austria. The drive through the chiseled mountains was spectacular! I stared out my window the entire trip and I marvelled at how beautiful the views were, from each bend in the road to the next.

But while I was enchanted by all of the natural beauty around me, the other people who were travelling with me, who had been up and down this road many, many times before, could care less. I was struck by how they were more interested in their Game Boys (remember, this was before everyone had cell phones) than they were in awe-inspiring mountain vistas that other people from other parts of the world would spend big money to see with their own eyes!

That was the first time I noticed that people were choosing technology over real life experiences.

Fast forward to 2018. Over the weekend, I was in a restaurant eating brunch and I noticed a couple sitting together at a small table but she was more interested in her cell phone and a magazine than her husband. He clearly wanted to have a good conversation over breakfast and occasionally she would look up and say a few words and then go back to her activity. I was sad for him.

“Play with me, not your phone!”

play with me not your phone.The next day, a friend of mine posted this telling photo on Facebook. “Play with me, not your phone!” is from a campaign in the U.K. that’s urging parents to put down their cell phones and be present with their kids.

It hurts me to think that kids are feeling neglected because their parents are more interested in something or someone out there more than they are their own kids who are right here.

I don’t know how you feel when someone you’re sitting with is replying to an interrupting text to someone who isn’t even in the room while you’re talking and trying to express yourself, but I sure don’t like it.

And believe me, if kids are feeling ignored in their formative years, this will cause some damage in their future relationships.

Unfortunately, being distracted is nothing new. Cell phones and digital devices are just a modern version of an old problem.

Remember the 1974 song, “Cats in the Cradle” by Harry Chapin?

And the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man in the moon
“When you coming home, dad?” “I don’t know when”
But we’ll get together then
You know we’ll have a good time then… 

A song worth listening to, for sure!

So, here’s our chance to be more mindful in our relationships and not let technology, (that still has its place in our modern lives), interfere with face-to-face conversations.

Create 3 No-Phone Zones Starting Today!

Take a stand in your relationships and be clear about these three no-phone zones. Tell everyone that in these three situations, cell phones and laptops are not allowed. Instead, try to encourage real, meaningful conversations with all of the people you care about. You’ll be amazed at what people have to say!

1. Meal Times at the Dinner Table

Breakfast, lunch, and dinner offer great opportunities for people to connect. I know many of us are on different schedules and have different food preferences, but that doesn’t mean we can’t share meals with each other. It’s a perfect time to work together as a team preparing meals and cleaning up. It’s also a chance for everyone to tell a story about the topic of the day!

2. Bedroom

People who don’t bring technology into the bedroom — like tv’s, laptops, and smart phones — sleep better. Also, as you’re winding down from your day, this is the perfect time to connect with your partner and have some pillow talk. It’s also a magical time to spend with your kids as you’re putting them to bed.

3. Car

Of course, this is more of a safety issue but you can also use the time in the car to check in with all of the passengers. And if you’re on a long-distance road trip, well that’s a perfect time to get to know each other better!

I hope this blog post inspires you to give the no phone zones a chance!

But if this idea pushes your buttons, ask yourself, what’s that about? What are you trying to avoid? Why do you feel your phone is more important?

Just remember, if you continue to choose your smart phone and technology over the real people in your life, you’re missing out on the beauty that’s around you!

Spiritual Guidance Available

Would you like to have some spiritual guidance on this topic? Consider signing up for a Free Crystal Mapping Session with Spa Therapist and Spiritual Wellness Coach, Maria Koropecky. Subscribe to this Crystal Clear Coaching blog and book your free Crystal Mapping Session today.